I weigh 20lbs (9kg) lighter, where to now?

As I am writing this, I weigh 52kg (114lbs). Well, tomorrow’s my monthly check-up at the hospital, maybe I’ll weigh less or more. I found out I hit 52kg (114lbs) just last month.

To be completely honest, I don’t think corsets were the main reason. However, corsetry was definitely part and parcel of the whole process. Like my dear friend Lucy says, the corsets are like running shoes. You can’t put them on and expect magic. You got to work with it.

As you all know, 61kg (134lbs) was my heaviest, back in May 2014, during the filming of Marco Polo.

Then there’s the suicide attempt and eventual change in meds, which was covered in my last post.

These days I get up around 9am and work on the last of my corset orders before I put Katastrophy Korsets on indefinite hiatus. I sleep around 10pm or 11pm, depending on whether I am enjoying a TV show with family.

I get 2-3 full meals a day and walk my dog at least once or twice a day. Occasionally, I take walks in the countryside to grab groceries.

I wouldn’t say I did a miracle program to get these numbers. Everything that led to this weight loss is a mixture of things.

I have the best friends in the world, Lowana, Lucy, Penny and Laysa are reminders of why I keep living.

The death of Christine, one year ago now, shook us and woke us all up.

Losing her was terrible, she was the mom of the group, whenever we needed advice, whenever we feel down, she used to smack us back to reality.

But after she left us, we had to turn to each other.

I won’t name names but some of us have saved each other from doing something rash.

Maybe it’s the feeling of near-death that changes things. Maybe it’s also actual death.

While not all of us have met each other in person, sometimes it feels like they’re physically there for you.

That’s what’s important.

I have also chosen to indefinitely retire from Facebook and Tumblr unless absolutely necessary. Everything there seems to be bringing me down.

Strangely enough, I was also away when the horrid news came, one year ago.

I am now lighter than I usually would be. Lighter than I originally intended to be.

I am virtually jobless, unqualified (without a diploma/degree) yet overqualified (no small job wants an English-speaking Chinese staff).

What do I do now?

I decided to pick up the 30-day Yoga Challenge as well as sell off a tonne of latexwear that no one wants me to model (though frankly, most of the bidders/buyers seem not to want to pay for their item).

I will start to focus on photographing and modelling more for GodsGirls and Cosplay Deviants, perhaps focus on rebranding Katastrophy Korsets as well.

That’s all I have planned right now. I will be job hunting still, hopefully something bites.

The difference is very slight. Also, shit lighting.

The difference is very slight. Also, shit lighting.